16/01/2007 by info.

You are tooling down the road on your bike on a wild, stormy night, when you pass by a bus stop and you see three people waiting for the bus:1. An old lady who looks as if she is about to die.
2. An old friend who once saved your life.
3. The perfect partner you have been dreaming about.

Which one would you choose to offer a ride to, knowing that you only have room for one passenger on the back of your bike?

Think before you continue reading.

This is a moral/ethical dilemma that was once actually used as part of a job application.

You could pick up the old lady, because she is going to die, and thus you should save her first. Or you could take the old friend because he once saved your life, and this would be the perfect chance to pay him back.
However, you may never be able to find your perfect mate again.

The candidate who was hired (out of 200 applicants) had no trouble coming up with his answer. He simply answered: “I would give the bike keys to my old friend and let him take the lady to the hospital. I would stay behind and wait for the bus with the partner of my dreams.

Sometimes, we gain more if we are able to give up our stubborn thought limitations. Never forget to “Think Outside of the Box.”

HOWEVER…., the correct answer is to run the old lady over and put her out of her misery, have sex with the perfect partner on the seat of the bike, then ride off with the old friend for a few beers.

…God, I just love happy endings !

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16/01/2007 by info.

New Rule #1: Don’t eat anything that’s served to you out a window unless you’re a seagull or a pelican. People are acting all shocked that a human finger was found in a bowl of Wendy’s chili. Hey, it cost less than a dollar. What did you expect it to contain? Caviar?New Rule #2: Stop saying that teenage boys who have sex with their hot, blonde teachers are permanently damaged. I have a better description for these kids: lucky bastards.

New Rule #3: Ladies, leave your eyebrows alone. Here’s how much men care about your eyebrows: do you have two of them? Okay, we’re done.

New Rule#4: Stop screwing with old people. Target Stores are introducing a redesigned pill bottle that’s square, with a bigger label. And the top is now the bottom. And by the time grandpa figures out how to open it, his ass will be in the morgue. Congratulations, Target, you just solved the Social Security crisis.

New Rule #5: The more complicated the Starbucks order, the bigger the asshole. If you walk into a Starbucks and order a “decaf grande half-soy, half-low fat, iced vanilla, double-shot, gingerbread cappuccino, extra dry, light ice, with one sweet-n’-Low, and one NutraSweet,” ooh, you’re a huge asshole.

New Rule #6: Just because your tattoo has Chinese characters in it doesn’t make you spiritual. It’s right above the crack of your ass. And it translates to “beef with broccoli.” The last time you did anything spiritual, you were praying to God you weren’t pregnant. You’re not spiritual. You’re just high.

New Rule #7: If you ever hope to be a credible adult and want a job that pays better than minimum wage, then for God’s sake don’t pierce or tattoo every available piece of flesh. If so, then plan your future around saying, “Do you want fries with that?”

©George Carlin

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16/01/2007 by info.

I think the life cycle is all backwards

You should start out dead and get it out of the way.

Then, you wake up in an old age home feeling better every day.

You get kicked out for being too healthy; go collect your pension, then when you start work, you get a gold watch on your first day.

You work 40 years until you’re young enough to enjoy your retirement.

You drink alcohol, you party, you’re generally promiscuous and you get ready for High School.

You go to primary school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a baby, and then…

You spend your last 9 months floating peacefully in luxury, in spa-like conditions; central heating, room service on tap, larger quarters every day, and then……………………………………..

you finish off as an orgasm.! I rest my case.

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16/01/2007 by info.

Here a slick, quick release, flip open vented cap with a vintage race car look. The cap bolts to a weld-in boss that you can weld on any tank. In cast aluminum with polished stainless hinge arms, with 2 versions: polished stainless or brass pivots & mounting screws.Includes viton gasket. For installation you must order the CNC machined ring with blind holes for steel or aluminum gas tank. Gas cap, as seen on signature bike El Mirage built by Cyril Huze. Visit Pro-Street Cycles for more info.

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